Friday, December 15, 2006
Diamonds Are Forever...But YOU Aren't
This time of year, there are nothing but diamonds commercials speaking about how they last forever and such. But what the commercials don't tell you is the dirty little secret that you are not forever and the diamond will surely be toasting to your demise on a beach somewhere in the Bahamas, living off of your Social Security checks.
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6 comments:
A better commercial would show a big fat guy wearing a diamond ring and demonstrating how it enhances your "punching power".
OR cutting glass to get a sufficient stabbing weapon and then laughing into the camera.
Diamonds are known as a girl's best friend. Dogs are known as man's best friend. Diamond Dogs is known as a kick-ass Bowie album.
The corrleation is clear: If you want to show your wife/girlfriend how much you love her, give her a Diamond Dogs CD.
Have a Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence!
I don't think the word "shiny" is used enough in diamond commercials.
(Husband hands wife diamond ring)
Wife: Oooooh. It's so shiny.
Husband: It is shiny, isn't it?
Wife: How do they get so shiny?
The theme song of Diamonds Are Forever --one of the first James Bond films I ever saw -- was sung by Shirley Bassey, who also sang the Goldfinger theme. Now, I'm not saying that that's anything more than coincidence, but I am saying that Jill St. John in a bikini on an oil platform gave this young lad the false impression that oil rigs were overrun with beautiful bikini-clad redheads -- a misapprehension that devastated me fifteen years later when I applied for a job at Exxon.
The 60s were all about attractive women in unusual colors such as the green woman of the Star Trek series and the woman coated in gold in James Bond. I would to have liked to have seen an Argyle woman in that time period.
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